The Pink Room

When Drew and I started searching for our first house together our vision was a family home. A minimum of four bedrooms located in a family friendly neighbourhood, walking distance to parks and other amenities and the right size to fit our future family. Before we were even married, our future children were in our thoughts.

 

We spent quite a few months searching for our perfect home. After looking at what seemed like hundreds of houses, we found the “one” that we knew would be a great home to start our life together. The moment I walked through the front door I could picture raising children here. The previous owners of our house also had children, so it certainly helped to picture what life would be like with children in our new home. There was one room in particular that stood out to me – the nursery. It wasn’t because it was the sweetest nursery I had ever seen and I could picture having one of my babies sleep inside; in fact it was the exact opposite. You were almost blinded when you entered the door from the bubblegum pink walls that surrounded the nursery furniture. I’m not talking about a cute, soft pink, more like a neon pink you would see at an 80s tight and bright party. I remember thinking, it wouldn’t be long until Drew and I were pregnant with our first child and I would be able to renovate this room and turn it into my dream nursery.

 

Since I was convinced it wouldn’t take long for us to get pregnant after our wedding, I made sure I was ready. By ready I mean I had searched hundreds of Pinterest boards and saved pictures of nursery designs that would soon transform “the pink room” into something special. I researched strollers, car seats, high chairs, etc. I would also catch myself daydreaming when I would be stopped at a red light, looking in my rearview mirror into the backseat, picturing what it would be like to have the backseat full of little people. Unfortunately as time went on, all I was left with was disappointment and heartache. What started as month after month of disappointment, soon turned into year after year. I stopped searching Pinterest, found myself daydreaming less, and every time I walked past a store that sold baby items I turned the other way. Every day I would walk past the pink room (which is exactly what Drew and I would call it), and be filled with sadness. Many times I contemplated just painting the room (which had now been turned into a spare bedroom for guests) a more neutral colour to improve its look, but it just never happened. Perhaps that’s because deep down I felt (or hoped) that the following month was going to be the one…the one where I finally find out I am pregnant.

 

After we had completed our application for adoption, Drew asked me if I wanted to start getting the nursery “ready” for the moment we got the call. At that time we had no idea when that moment would be; we were told it could take an average of a few years. Drew had thought it would give me hope and keep my mind busy to transform the pink room into the nursery of my dreams, but instead I declined. I felt like it was much easier on the heart walking past a room with pink walls and a spare bed then a nursery that was empty without a baby in it.

 

After four and a half years of walking past the pink room every day, on July 11th we received our life changing call that would bless us with Jayce. It was FINALLY time to transform the pink room into a nursery that would be perfect for our baby boy. I logged into my Pinterest account, went to my private baby board, and started searching through the many nursery designs I had previously saved. We only had two short months to get everything ready for Jayce’s arrival. With every stroke of the paintbrush over the pink walls, the sadness started to slowly disappear. It didn’t take long for the pink room to transform into something special. I now find myself walking past Jayce’s nursery with a smile on my face. When I’m rocking Jayce to sleep I can’t help but feel blessed. It’s hard to describe how a few coats of paint and some nursery furniture could be so healing.

 

Although the pink room is no longer, I find myself thinking about it often. It was more than just pink walls that I yearned to paint over…it taught me the meaning of “this too shall pass”, and how the best things in life are truly worth waiting for.

 

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